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Throughout life we experience many transitions, switching schools as we age from middle school to highschool to college, when accepting a job position or changing career paths, engaging in a romantic relationship after being single, among others. And during those transitions, our relationships change, we fall in and out of contact with others.

My best friends and I are at very different points in our lives, I being untraditional am raising a four year old on my own at a young age while managing school and work, and putting my social life aside. I’ve buried the love of my life, am working on starting a nonprofit, and am in competition with suburban moms in mini vans.

My best friend, Layla, as we will call her, has graduated with her Bachelors degree this past year and has started her career, moved in with her boyfriend of over a year, and most often can be found doing home improvement projects, hosting dinners with her or her boyfriend’s parents, or out socializing at bars, casinos, sporting events and such. Neither of us would switch or trade our life experiences for the others, and I like to think we’ve learned a lot from each other, but they are indeed different.

And while we luck out, in typically clearly understanding each other without much explanation, our friendship, like any relationship, requires work.

Most friends of the same age are going through similar experiences. For us, it’s a bit more difficult to keep up with what the other is doing. So when she recommended dinner one random Friday night, I planted the idea of meeting on a regular basis in her head. Just like that, I was able to check one activity off the book’s list!

“Keep in touch. Start a regular monthly get-together with three or four friends. Choose an evening-for example the first Friday of every month- and take it in turns to meet at each other’s homes. Keep it simple. Get a few bottles of wine and order a big pizza to share.”

We tweaked this one a bit, as we weren’t real interested in pizza or each other’s houses. Wine was good! Being out allows us a bit more freedom to try to new places, head out of town, and escape from the realities of life that linger in our homes. It gives us the opportunity to experience new restaurants, new foods and drinks.

We’ve gone out twice now as we are sticking to meeting the first Friday of each month. She chose the first place, I chose the second, and I’m sure we will continue to alternate. I already have my mind set on my next month’s turn to pick! I’ve always wanted to be a city girl, so we are going in!

I guess the important part of this isn’t just that I completed one of my “to-do’s” but more so that I have the regular time out with a friend. The “work” I have to put into this relationship just got much easier and a lot more fun. The consistency, knowing I’m going out every first Friday, is a much needed break to a schedule I’d other-wise pack full with work. It’s for me, one step closer to feeling single and seizing the moment.

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