, , , , ,

The first chapter, Seize the moment, of Eva Gizowska book, “Things to do now that you’re…single again”,  starts with an encouraging preface about looking around to discover the countless opportunities for happiness that surround you. (Despite not necessarily feeling like it)

Some are challenging, some require planning, some promote spontaneity, and some are simple.

When my boyfriend passed my close friends and some very dear friends from my grade school days were there to support me. Furthermore, they persuaded me to not give up on living.

I’m not referring to any suicidal innuendo, more or less they wanted me to cheer up and make me view death as a very big bump in this journey that I would “make it through”. They wanted me to healthfully grieve ofcourse, but also understand that I could still go out, do things, and be happy again.

(See the similarity between this book with its “break up perspective” and me and my friends with a “coming out of a relationship due to death” perspective?)

These friends, Dani and Lyla, they were there at the funeral and they were there the first time I stepped out of the house to be social again, which for the record required a wig to make me unrecognizable . That’s what best friends are for! And the wig? Well that was for the nosey judgmental people who’d be coming up to ask me stupid questions like “how are you?” and “what happened?”.

Again for the record, “my boyfriend of eight years died, no I’m not going to give you details about who found him and where, also I’m not ok but I’m still kicking.” OBVIOUSLY!

What was surprising to me, was that friends who I hadn’t seen since gradeschool came to the funeral, despite our lack of connection over the manner years since then.

That being said when I found Eva’s suggestion to “pick up the phone and call a friend you haven’t spoken to for months” I knew who to call! I called two of my best gradeschool friends who I haven’t really spoken to much in years and rather than chit chat on the phone we met up for dinner. In that short 2 hour period we did our best to get up to speed on each other’s lives since graduation and ofcourse what was most currently going on. It was completely refreshing and reminded me just why I had always loved them so much.

Despite the distance, the time, and such, those girls will always mean so much to me. And much like they were there for me, so too will always be for them! Seizing the moment, and the past!