This week the quote, “Your single now so you can be more flexible. Change is good for you and will help you to put things in perspective” stands out to me.
We talked about my inability to be spontaneous in last year’s chapter, Seize the Moment. It’s prevented me from accomplishing quite a bit. It’s not that i’m incapable, it’s that i’m a mother and this book isn’t for divorcees. (Or for that matter young, never married moms with deceased boyfriends). Likewise, change is a challenge for me. I’m regimented. I live by planners, to do lists, responsibility charts that reward my sons good behavior, (and this book heaven’s sake).
But like clockwork, my life is at a transition. I swear it happens every six months.
Have we discussed what I do for living? I am a nanny. I’ve been a nanny for the past 4 years. I did the whole babysitting thing to make money throughout highschool. Infact I started when I was ten years old. When I found out I was expecting, before finishing school I knew I’d need to make a decent income, but also need a job that would allow me to be a stay at home parent. Silly, right? Except not! Being a nanny allows me to work full time and “be home” full time. (Just in somebody else’s home). But with my son none the less!
Over the years I’ve had families that I’ve work for full time and periods where I worked for a number of families, a different one each day of the week. When my boyfriend passed away I was full time with one family, but shortly after his passing things went awry with the agreement the family and I made, and I moved on to working for a number of families. I have continued to work for all of them over the past year and half and I have grown very much attached to them. However, not being full time with any one family doesn’t come with the financial perks that being with one family all the time has. And while I work with children because I love them, the financial situation just wasn’t preferred.
Eva suggests in the first chapter seize the moment that, “if you’re not happy in your job, it’s time to update you CV and find one you’ll love. Life’s too short to do work you hate. Use your new ‘me time’ to work on yourself”. My first thought, “CV?” Eva must be from the UK. My second thought, “this goes along with change and am I ready for one?”
I actually fired up my resume and submitted it to a temp agency last year just for fun. I thought I’d try to accomplish this to-do while experiencing different jobs. While the agency hired me, I discovered the whole being a mom thing, trying to go to school, and run a non-profit wasn’t likely to work cohesively with an ever changing schedule, so I rejected the offer.
About a month ago I got a call from someone looking for a full time nanny. I jumped at the opportunity to interview with the family, but for the first time, despite working with one family being ideal, was really concerned about making the move. Over the past month I’ve had various discussions with the family and began working for them full time this past week. I happy to say, I am really enjoying them!
Typically i’m hard on myself and the way in which I go about accomplishing Eva’s recommended to-do’s. I never want to half-ass it and this objective in particular I wanted to take very seriously. Obviously I would love to go live in Africa studying elephants (my dream job)! But in addition to not yet having the prerequisites on my resume to making that a reality, I also have a child, a non profit that I love running, and a whole laundry list of responsibilities.
While I’m the first one to say don’t ever let society’s standards, morals, and responsibilities keep you from living your dreams, i’m truly very happy with where I’m at right now.
When my school term ended in December I agreed to allow myself a semester off. I have been working three jobs, running a non profit, going to school while being a mom for a long time now. Someone told me that’s burning the stick at both ends. I like that analogy, I never thought of it that way, it’s definitely a new perspective. I wanted to use this new time away from school to focus on my son more. I signed him up for a number of activities he’s shown interest in and for once I just wanted to be the soccer mom. Not the soccer mom frantically trying to run the bake sale and head up the PTA, just the soccer mom. The fully engaged watching her child’s game, soccer mom.
This perspective gave me the courage to make a change, to take time off school, to accept this full time job offer. This perspective and the changes that resulted are helping me find balance. Balance, such a necessity to a healthy happy me!